The real me .........

Surrounded by souls I feel relieved,
I am tired of being alone.
The loneliness drags me into the past,
the forlornness interrogates my soul.
The flashing moments of the past threat my soul,
My heart feels the tip of the sword.
Smile and laughter are my mighty weapons,
they shield me from the thunders on the shaft.
Roaming around and chattering mouth,
Keeps me away from the thoughts of the past.
With people around I feel so safe,
they don't care for me but life seems to end fast !
They think I am happy in the lap of comforts,
but the unrest and pain they don't see.
Colorful glares I put on my eyes,
and the world stays amazed to see me glee.
The emotions in me keep dying each day,
but I wear a smile to showcase.
They think I am arrogant they take me proud,
I keep them amused and feel the bitter taste.
I am scared of the mysteries the darkness holds,
but the mere thought of dreams keeps me awake.
People find me smiling and chirpy,
but life, without you, seems to be on a break  !!